Online dating stereotypes of behavior are models of behavior expected from representatives of a particular society or culture in certain life situations. Stereotypes of behavior of men and women, strict distribution of roles in dating situations and relationships are firmly entrenched in Eastern European society, in the minds of Slavs.
A vivid example of the model of expected behavior in Eastern European countries is the situation of dating and the development of a relationship between a man and a woman. Both in this life situation are assigned a clearly defined role and created a framework beyond which it is considered not only inadmissible and humiliating for a male or a female representative, but sometimes even indecent.
Stereotypes of behavior adopted in Eastern European countries “work” only in Eastern European society, understood only by Slavic men and women. To foreigners they are not only unfamiliar, but sometimes even alien.
By following the “desired” pattern of behavior (the manner of behavior “expected” from a woman in Eastern Europe), you expect a foreign man to react and behave in the manner typical of Slavic men.
Stereotypical behavior in international online dating situations does not bring the desired result
Because the situation itself is initially different. You are not just getting acquainted with a person from another country, a person who grew up in another society, in another social and cultural reality, even the “format” of acquaintance is different: the first thing you see is not a live person, but his profile on an international dating site. This should be taken into account when thinking about how to build your behavior in relation to a foreigner and not to waste your time on communication mistakes, which can be avoided by understanding the specific mentality of men from other countries and online dating in general.
Stereotypes that Slavic women are used to following:
- Stereotype 1: a woman must wait for an initiative to start dating a man or it is indecent to write to a man first, to show her interest in getting to know him.
Perhaps an Eastern European will reproach a woman for taking the initiative, because he is familiar with the stereotypes of behavior in Eastern European society and they are firmly established in his mind. A European, on the other hand, would not even think that there might be something unworthy in a woman’s interest in meeting a man. European men believe that a confident woman who knows what she wants has the right to express an interest in dating. A European man, instead of filling his head with preconceptions about who and how he should behave, will be happy to receive your letter!
- Stereotype 2: A man must seek a woman’s affection.
How should a man at the very beginning of online dating pursue a woman he has never seen in real life, who is “familiar” to him only through pictures, information given in her profile? Agree, think about it, think critically about the situation and “decompose it into simple components”, such a “demand” becomes meaningless. How serious can you be about the placement of a photo in a questionnaire? A pretty picture in the profile may encourage a foreigner to act, but the “effect” she has on the man, must be backed up by her actions: the man should understand that she is willing to get acquainted with him (detailed and timely responses to his letters, willingness to communicate via video call, a desire to meet the man in real life). A man who is ready for a serious relationship will seek the location of a real woman. However, for this acquaintance must take place: the woman and the man should start correspondence on a dating site, see each other by video call, meet in real life. Internet dating is very different from real life dating, from “face to face” dating. Stereotypes of behavior, unspoken “rules of dating” accepted in real life do not work on the Internet.
In Europe there is a widespread view of the relationship between a man and a woman as a relationship between two partners who are both interested in developing a relationship, in each other’s satisfaction with that relationship. A European man will not “impose himself” on a woman who is expressly “not interested” in getting to know him (which is how many Eastern European women are accustomed to behave when they start dating).
Foreigners do not understand why Slavic women are so emphatically cold and arrogant in their communication with them. They have heard so much about the open and hospitable Russian soul.
Break free from convention
If you want to create a relationship with a foreigner, you are well aware that this will entail a change of your country of residence. It is quite possible that people in another country will not understand your way of thinking, and consequently the model of behavior, reaction to people and events of everyday life, which you are used to in your home country. The stage of dating with foreigners, time to find your man is given to you so that you can become open to a different culture, a different view of the world and rethink the attitudes given to you by the society in which you grew up. Being open and tolerant will help you adjust to your new country and begin a new and fulfilling life.
The world is changing at breakneck speed, society and social institutions are changing. Science is changing, social roles are shifting (this is not only happening in the West. In Eastern Europe there is also a gradual shift in values and social roles.) We live in a unique and distinctive time. We should not be guided by the past, by a model of society that is already outdated.
You are responsible for your own happiness! Do not let outsiders dictate you strict conditions, only adhering to which you will be able to meet your man and create a worthy relationship.