Get Back An Ex-boyfriend. when a relationship collapses, you don’t want to savor it, there is no pleasant nostalgic longing for what is now in the past. You want to live a new life as soon as possible. To distance yourself from the pain you have to live with, to forget them with all their mistakes and pleasant moments. Scientists have not yet invented a pill to selectively remove memories. But psychologists already know how to forget someone whom you strongly love, how long it takes to begin to forget a man who left, and what to do if you can’t forget a guy you broke up with. We share this information with you.
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Tips for girls: how to forget the man you love
After a breakup you want to take away the pain in any way, quickly forget your beloved and stop thinking about him. And better – as soon as possible to get rid of all feelings for the departed person, once and for all, to get out of the situation in which you find yourself with less losses. Unfortunately or fortunately, it is impossible to easily forget your ex and start a new life. And the best healer for a broken heart is still time.
At such moments you are not the mistress of your brain. In spite of your longing not to think about the man at all, events have developed in such a way that he is the only person you will mainly think about. It is unpleasant and painful, but you will have to put up with it if your main goal is to cut the man who does not love you out of your life. There are other ways to make a man fall in love with you, but they are not easy at all.
Time, patience, and gentleness to yourself. – Three major tools you will need during this period. You’ll have to allow and forgive yourself in advance for bad moods, breakdowns, sobs, and pounds of ice cream-anything your body decides to engage in during a time of stress. Believe me, it’s cheaper to let it all in the long run than to not let it happen.
The first thing you need to do prepare yourself for what’s going to be hard, and decide not to berate yourself for anything that happens until the “hard” is over. So if you want to walk away from the relationship so that this person can never step on a sore spot, hurt, or cause a storm of anxiety again, stock up on patience, to yourself, and read on.
Get Back An Ex-boyfriend? Is it possible to get over an ex.
Will a person and everything associated with him ever disappear from your memory? Not completely, of course. Memories will fade and thin over time but the fact of the relationship with the person and the main impression from them will definitely stay with you. With them will come a certain set of memories and emotions devoted to that period in your life and, perhaps, some attitude toward all of this that is still alive today.
This is what it will look like a few years later if you go through the breakup correctly. If not, the memories of the person and what happened between you will hurt you for many, many years to come. There will be unlived emotions: you won’t care when you come into contact with your ex. It won’t be easy for you to remember that you were once together and then split up. You may become angry, frightened, want revenge, want to show superiority – all of which will indicate that you did not live the breakup fully. No matter how much time has passed since then.
You are unlikely to ever thoroughly forget that relationship, if they were important to you, if you were in love. But you have the power to make sure that the memory of it doesn’t touch you in any way, or even evoke that very pleasant nostalgia for the old days. This nostalgia will not necessarily be addressed to your partner: it can be about how you yourself felt in that relationship. Maybe it was easy for you, or you didn’t love anyone else as much, or maybe you found exactly what you desperately needed in that relationship at the time. Then you feel nostalgic, but you don’t miss your partner. And that’s perfectly normal.
The facts will forever or almost forever remain in your memory. You don’t get to the point where you see a person on the street and you don’t recognize them, you don’t remember them. You won’t forget the relationship itself. It’s just that the memory of it will become dimmer and stop hurting you, and that’s a great result.
Methods to help you forget him
So, you have broken up, but you are not ready to plunge headlong into grief. Trying to ward it off is normal, and you shouldn’t forbid yourself a breath of fresh air – you have enough longing as it is. Try to find a point of balance.: not to forget your pain, to give it space, but also to take your mind off it from time to time.
Let’s talk in detail about the top eight ways to distract yourself and get the guy you love out of your head:
- New hobby. Do something you’ve been meaning to try for a long time. The more hours a week you can give to it, the more exciting it will be in the process – the better. Sports are ideal: the body will benefit from the hormones that are produced during physical activity, and the concentration on the body and the precise performance of movements is excellent for distracting yourself from sad thoughts. In addition, after the workout you will have a little less desire to kill it. Because of hormones and fatigue.
- Write letters. If you can’t take your mind off the person, write everything you think about them. It’s important to do it by hand and on paper. The fate of this letter is not so important: you can keep it, you can burn it, you can tear it up. The important thing is to keep it out of your ex’s hands. You are writing not for him but for yourself, remember that from the very beginning. By writing about the sick person in a letter, you will feel that it bothers you less.
- Ask for support from your friends. They’ll understand and they’ll probably take care of you. Get out to meetings and hang out, do something together. Be present in the company: its dynamics are a great distraction from everything else.
- Make plans for the days you’ve traditionally spent together. Fill them with something pleasant, but different from the relationship and associations with it. Great for desires that you’ve wanted to do for a long time, and for things that your relationship has gotten in the way of. Do it and enjoy the fact that you can return to them.
- Go see a therapist. You may only need a few meetings, but a therapist will help you not get lost in negative experiences, get through them as fully as possible, and come out a healthy, whole person. A therapist will accept everything that happens to you, unlike most friends. And will help you find a way to deal with your experiences in a way that doesn’t crush them and still survive. He is trained in these things and knows more about them, and that makes him and that kind of help especially valuable.
- Be more patient and more loyal to yourself. Cry if you feel like it. Eat lots of sweets if you feel like it. Don’t deny anything that happens to you. Try to listen to yourself and provide as much comfort, as much self-care as possible. You have enough stress as it is.
- Don’t be shy about presenting your feelings. Chances are, you’ll want to talk to your ex. And probably even more than once. Don’t forbid yourself this: sometimes it is through contact with reality that you need to crush your expectations. Are you hoping that he will want to return, miss him, are you so angry that you can’t keep quiet? Offer to see him and say what you have accumulated. See how you react, some of your illusions will crumble. After one or more meetings you’ll come to terms with the status quo, you’ll notice that this interaction is not good for you, you’ll realize that you are worth more to yourself than these feelings. And letting go of the situation will become easier.
- Choose best dating site, the most interesting for you and spend your time with benefit and pleasure.
These are the main tips for getting over and letting go of a young man who doesn’t care about you. But there are additional ones that will help you forget the guy you loved and don’t need anymore more easily.
- Dig deep into your work: it’s easy to transform anger and resentment into energy for hard work.
- Take a trip – at least for a weekend.
- Avoid places you used to love to go as a couple.
- Allow yourself hours for concentrated sadness and other emotions.
- Get rid of things that remind you of relationships.
- Say goodbye to the person in the way you want and that will make you feel better.
- Join an interest group.
- Share those experiences and the rest of the relationship experience – don’t roll into thinking that all men are the same.
- Try not to think about what’s going on with him and what he’s thinking.
- Don’t look for someone to blame.
What to do if you’re still in love
In the first place. to take care of your feelings and not bury them along with the relationship. For some reason it is often not possible to fall out of love and leave the man you have become attached to. Don’t sound the alarm too soon: love will fade, but there is no need to force the process.
Love, now unrequited, will have to be reconciled with reality. It will last for some time–you can never know in advance how long. If you go out of your undying love to see your ex periodically and make sure that it won’t be the same, it may fade a little faster, but you will be in more pain.
Don’t put her anywhere: let her live. You can still give her space – in fantasies and on paper. Your love is not to blame for the breakup, so don’t seek to destroy it and give it time to fade away on its own.
What to do if feelings have cooled down, but he still won’t come out of your head
One of two things: either not much time has passed, or feelings haven’t cooled down after all. Try to figure it out: Do you want that relationship back? If yes, then you haven’t lived through the breakup yet, and it’s okay to think about the person. If not, maybe you have something to say. There’s some unfinished business left, and it needs to be dealt with. Go to our dating rating and start a new life.
If you’re wondering why you can’t get over a guy you used to like, be careful about the context in which he pops into your thoughts. Find the reason why you’re thinking about him, and deal with that reason. Give yourself some more time, meet with him, write and ask about what’s bothering you-just resolve the situation.
What you definitely shouldn’t do
- Don’t try to force yourself right away. Give up on a loved one who has abandoned you and move on with your life.
- Don’t call him all the time. Don’t look at common photos, don’t hang out on his social networking profiles.
- Don’t throw mud at him. In the circle of mutual friends.
- Don’t write sorrowful posts. And don’t try to publicly call his attention to your broken heart.
- Don’t show up in those places, where he goes and where you went together.
- Don’t think of the end of this relationship as the end of your life.
- Don’t promise yourself never again. Not to enter into a relationship.
- Don’t compare him to others. And don’t stigmatize all men because of his misdeeds.
- Don’t wallow in your pain all the time.
- Don’t make breaking up the only topic that you discuss with everyone else.