The goal of serious online dating is a real relationship. Real meetings help to understand if a couple who met on an international dating site can have a future together. The first meeting plays a special role: it helps to understand if the feelings that arose during distant communication were not an illusion. Often when we want something badly and are looking forward to it, we tend to idealize the situation, our reaction (we think we will like the foreigner in real life) and the person himself.
There are three possibilities for arranging a first meeting with a foreigner: the man comes to the woman’s city of residence; the woman visits the man in his country of residence; the man and woman meet at a resort. We do not recommend the last two options for arranging a first meeting: going to a man’s city and vacationing together. The willingness of ladies to invest in the first meeting with a foreigner is quite low. And men, in turn, have doubts and are afraid to be deceived when it comes to financing a trip for a lady they met on an international dating site. Recall that one of the most common fraud schemes on the Internet is to pay for a trip for a pretty stranger who is ready to come to a man to meet him. Once the first meeting has taken place, and both are convinced that a relationship is possible and the new internet acquaintance or acquaintance is “real”, questions of a material nature and the doubts associated with them cease to influence the decision-making process.
In consequence of the above-mentioned reasons, we advise choosing the following option for the first meeting: the foreigner comes to the woman’s country for dating.
On the pages of our blog for men, we try to explain to them why it’s so important to come to a woman’s house for the first meeting. Many men understand this and are willing to make the trip if they meet a really serious woman** who will arouse not only sympathy but also trust. However, there are exceptions – men who are not ready to make the trip to Eastern Europe.
We would like to point out that if a woman is really important to a man, if he is interested in developing a relationship with her, he’s willing to come.. The rest are excuses, disinterestedness, and a latent unwillingness to take serious steps. A man who is afraid of something or finds reasons for it is better to forget and not worry about it. If he is not willing to do manly things at the beginning of a relationship, he won’t be willing to do them later on.
Tips for arranging a first meeting with a foreigner
- We advise you to meet a man at the airport upon arrival. For a foreigner who does not speak Russian and has no experience traveling to Eastern Europe, getting to the hotel on his own will be very difficult. Meeting a man at the airport is a show of concern on the part of the woman.
- A man should book a hotel room for himself. There are men who would like to save money on hotel accommodations and, for this reason, inquire if they could spend the night at a woman’s apartment. You should not get to know each other so intimately at the first meeting, everyone should have his own personal space. After all, the following situation may arise: having met at the airport, after spending together a few hours or days, you will come to the conclusion that you do not like each other. If the man does not have a hotel room booked, he and the woman will find themselves in an awkward situation. To avoid this, it will be much easier for the man and woman to initially plan to stay apart. He’s at the hotel and she’s at her home.
- Avoid shopping with the man (unless it’s a gift shop). It won’t make a good impression. After all, any man wants to be loved for who he is, not for the gifts he can give. His material wealth has nothing to do with the selfless, pure feelings that are the key to a sincere relationship.
- Show initiative/readiness to pay for little things, such as his own portion of the restaurant bill or a cab from the airport to the hotel.
- Do as you would like to be done to you, namely, do not abandon a foreigner you do not like to your own fate. Unfortunately, there are cases where a foreign man has not made the right impression on a woman and has been “abandoned” to his fate in a foreign country, without knowledge of the language. In such cases, the woman had an “urgent” need to go to the hairdresser, then there were other “important things” to do, and the foreigner was left alone in a city he did not know. If you do not like a man, and it can happen and you should be prepared for it, treat him in good conscience, treat him as a good friend. After all, he only came for you! Show him the city, spend the planned time with him, don’t leave him! It is enough to calmly explain that, unfortunately, sympathy did not arise and this meeting was the first and the last. Think about how you would feel if you were in a man’s shoes, in this situation…
- Be willing to compromise. If you live in a remote location that is not easy or impossible to get to by plane, it is better to arrange a meeting in another large city where the man can easily get there. For example, in the capital. It is possible to book two rooms in one hotel in advance (as noted above, during the first meeting it is better that everyone has his own private space), to choose convenient flights so that you both arrive at the same airport, meet there, and then go to the hotel together.
Finally, here’s the official information on German citizens traveling to Eastern Europe. According to the data for 2017: citizens of Germany are required to obtain a visa for travel to Russia and Belarus (a stay of up to 5 days in Belarus does not require a visa). Travel to Kazakhstan (stays of up to 30 days) and Ukraine (stays of up to 90 days) does not require a visa.
* Meeting in a resort location has one advantage: if a man and woman do not like each other, they can easily explain themselves, say goodbye and each will continue their vacation.
** How women sometimes, unknowingly, give the impression of being uninterested in a serious relationship, we talked about in the article “Serious Dating Site with Foreigners: Am I Serious about Finding a Husband?”