After 20+ years of formal worldwide analysis on the subject of youthful males relationship older girls, I’m seeing the Cougar relationship development altering. I’m excited to see the final barrier to male/feminine relationships lastly being dissolved and in search of its personal degree towards permanence. There are nonetheless older girls who need a boy toy or a no strings connected relationship. They could also be completely fed up with in search of one thing long run, do not need to remarry and benefit from the freedom of getting a good friend with advantages the place there may be restricted or no drama. And that is superb. As I typically say on my Cougar relationship web site,”There is a lid for every pot.” But what I’m noticing and listening to from each women and men on my web site is that the youthful males who usually are not “thrill seekers” or inexperienced at Cougar relationship and the ladies who’ve gained constructive experiences relationship youthful males and don’t need to return to relationship males their age or older are searching for one thing extra lengthy lasting, significant and, dare I say it? Permanent.
Yes, statistics from my web site are displaying that some 90% of ladies are searching for love and maybe even marriage to a youthful man. The BBC reported in a documentary that 25% of our neighbors throughout the pond are fortunately married to youthful males. 30% of older girls are open to and relationship youthful males within the United States. Although there are various newcomers to Cougar relationship, 45% of ladies who’ve dated youthful males earlier than and do not plan going again to relationship males their age or older. I’m discovering that the older Cubs, primarily mature younger males of their late 20’s to 30’s and older, are fascinated about long run relationships, particularly if they’ve beforehand dated or been married to older girls. The Boy Toys (which is what I name the ‘serial gamers’ are usually males from ages 18 to mid and even late 20’s who’re inexperienced with girls, laboring underneath what I’ve termed “The Myth of Stiffler’s Mom”, or thrill in search of with as many ladies as they will get preyed upon by. Yes, Virginia, the 30 12 months outdated male virgins do exist, and plenty of of them are searching for an older lady to point out them the ropes. The attention-grabbing factor is, as soon as they expertise a properly rounded relationship with an older lady, they’re means much less inclined to endure by way of the immaturity, selfishness and lack of life expertise of a lady their age or youthful. This is when many Boy Toys convert to devotees of Cougar relationship. As one younger Cub from Atlanta advised me, “I was not looking for love. I wanted to hunt as many Cougars as I could and just have fun. And then I met this wonderful woman from New York.” He is completely in love; and is not love grand? He went from eager to work his means up the age ladder to falling head over heels along with his Cougar lady. I simply love when folks discover one another, and as I typically say, “there is a lid for every pot.”
Since Cougar relationship is changing into extra mainstream within the United States, an increasing number of girls are popping out of the closet. I’m seeing extra girls from the midwest and the southern states becoming a member of the location this 12 months over final 12 months, when nearly all of members had been from bigger cities resembling Los Angeles. The UK and Canada have traditionally been “out” and you will be laborious pressed to seek out anybody who has not heard the time period “Cougar”. Hate it or adore it, it’s right here to remain so girls are beginning to embrace it and outline it for themselves. It is shedding its derogatory connotation and males are discovering that there isn’t any “one definition fits all” Cougar. As the myths of the leopard print carrying, feminine predator provides technique to soccer mothers, secretaries, financial institution tellers, attorneys, the day by day lady replaces the adolescent male fantasy, and girls have gotten extra comfy taking a look at males 7 years or extra their junior and saying, “Why not?” And an increasing number of youthful males are telling me they’re falling in love with their Cougar girls.
Mainstreaming Cougar relationship is resulting in world broad acceptance of this cross generational relationship development; a development which is right here to remain. My members are popping out of the closet to their family and friends members. Actuaries will even agree that statistically talking, it simply is sensible for an older lady to fulfill, date, mate and marry a youthful man. I spoke with a retired Harvard educated medical physician not too long ago who advised me that biologically it made extra sense for a girl in her sexual prime so far and marry a person in his sexual prime. The girls take pleasure in being with a person who’s attentive, affectionate, energetic, very important, protecting, enjoyable and has much less baggage than his older male counterpart. The males love being with a girl who’s nurturing, mature, has life perspective, is aware of what she desires, is not needy, insecure or shallow. The pots have discovered their lids. The lids have discovered their pots!
It is simply a pure segue and a straightforward look into the Cougar crystal ball to see the apparent: There will likely be extra long run Cougar and Cub relationships and marriages simply across the nook. Thrill seekers, nevertheless, needn’t apply.